Santa Strikes Back

Wow, I am really enjoying these exchanges with old St. Nick.  That’s what I love about WordPress.  The community aspect.  Hey, lookie, I got another email.

From: Santa is NOT a fatty [ThebigSman@northpole.com]

To: Naughty Alice [alice@wonderland.com]

Subject: Santa is getting a little angry now

Dear Alice,

There is no end to your depravity, is there?  I sent a SWAT team of elves out to fetch my poor reindeer.  Instead of Rudolf, what do I get?  A pony with a bulb strapped to his nose.  A depressed pony at that.  Where is Rudolf?

I am not fooled by this, Alice.

I am not fooled by this, Alice.

If I don’t get my reindeer back soon, there will be no one to drive my sleigh.  Then how will anybody get presents?  You know, the deserving children that don’t steal and blackmail and kidnap innocent reindeer.  Think about it.

Santa

P.S.   Santa has nukes.  F.Y.I.

15 responses

  1. Shame the big red nose didn’t cheer up the sad pony…maybe it’s just too cold up at the north pole for him. Any news on whether your blackmail is working on him? If it does could you hold out for a nice new telly for me too? 👿

    1. If you look at Sad Pony very, very closely, you’ll see that his lip turned up a fraction of a centimeter. It’s subtle. I have plans for Santa – something even nukes can’t stop! There should be plenty o’ gifts for all!

      1. Muwahahahaha! Can we at least get Santa out of that red suit coca cola put him in?? I want a green santa but never see any. I think I’ll have to make one myself.

  2. Go Alice! Go Alice!
    Did Santa just threaten you? Look who’s being naughty now.

    (There is absolutely no way to say the word naughty without sounding too E.L. James-y)

    1. Yeah, you don’t screw with the Alice. Unless, like, you’re super hot. Wait. Too much E.L. James.

  3. Wow. I never took you for a reindeer thief. I see you in a whole new light now…

    1. Would that be an Evil Light? Cause I’m up with that. Whatever that means.

      1. Eh, more mischievous than evil…

  4. Well Santa, if you want your reindeer back all you need to do is send Alice her Noo Noo. Leave it in the park behind the trash can and if there are any police or elves lurking, Rudolph is finished. You hear me Santa, finished.

    1. Hahahahaha! We could be awesome partners in crime.

  5. […] AliceAtWonderland — brilliant, inspiring, caring. Total girl crush. […]

  6. Ooohh…Santa. Naughty Alice…haha. Sad pony had me fooled! But now, I have the full story. You’re just trying to save the poor reindeer. Bless your heart. You’re not naughty at all!

    1. I am totally altruistic and stuff.

  7. Poor, poor, Sad Pony. Being used as a pawn in your games with Santa.

    1. Sad Pony said Santa’s workshop was not nearly as cold as my heart. He gives me the bets compliments.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: