This all started with that bloody Daily Post. The nice WP person who is much more computer savvy than I, talked about how you could insert a Google map into one of your posts. And then you could talk about all the places you had been. This would have been pretty lame. Or you could talk about where you wanted to go. I figured that would be more fun, and I could make it really nuts, and travel from Texas to Canada (I hear it’s better) to Mexico (I like the food) to Chile (I like countries with food names) to Antarctica (I like Penguins).
But, predictably, I could not get this feature to work. I tried drawing lines between points and my lines would not work when I wanted to, but worked splendidly when I didn’t want them to do so. And sometimes Google Maps would place markers in the middle of say, the Indian Ocean. I’m not a very good swimmer. Finally, when I was done, Google Maps showed a picture of . . . blue. That was the map. I have no idea what I did.
It doesn’t help that I have absolutely no sense of Geography whatsoever. All those European countries over there are all just floating around hither and yon and I have no idea what all they have in Africa. I did at one time – right after I took my Geography class, but then my brain decided it could dump that file. Who needs that when you can hang onto 5o prepositions (aboard, about, above, across . . .) and the names of all the Cabbage Patch Kids you had as a child. Clearly this info is more important.
Not only do I not know Geography, I don’t even know where I am at any one time. I have no sense of direction, and can get lost in the city I’ve lived either by or in MY ENTIRE LIFE. This is a source of great amusement to my husband, but not so much to me, as I circle around and around the same gas station, trying to find my way to the doctor’s office I’ve visited dozens of times before.
So I figured that since I couldn’t get Google Maps to work, I’d just make my own freaking map. I made a map of Wonderland as it exists in my blog world. Hop down the rabbit hole and take a look.
Just remember: if you get lost, do not ask me for directions.