Once upon a time, there was a girl named Alice who went around begging for blog bling. She was not subtle about it. Nope, she wrote several posts on it, in fact. She whined on people’s blogs when she wasn’t selected. Whining turns out to be a very effective bargaining tool, for soon she was rolling in bling which she put in her bling closet labeled Unbirthday Presents.
Then Alice got busy. She had things to do. Like avoid housework and play video games and insult stupid books and hack up mounds of mucus. Cool stuff you guys just wouldn’t understand. So she didn’t write a thank you post. She meant to, but life, you know, she was trying to find one and that takes TIME people.
So there’s this backlog, and though she tried to keep records, she has none, except the kind that go round, round, baby, right round, like a record baby, right round, round round. What’s a lazy girl to do? Write one post to try to cover her rear end, that’s what she’s to do. And here it is, in all its glory!
Here’s a couple of awards I just got, so I actually remember them. They were given to me by another Alice from a parallel universe blog. First up is awesomesauce because it has a dragon. Check it.
Next, is one that just showed up and has been floating around the blogosphere. It’s the We Are Family award, and I get to be part of this messed up little family. Woot!
And there were others, others that . . . crap I forgot. I think one had Sunshine in it, because I’m just full of it. Sunshine, that is. And . . . um, others, just too many to mention! Yes, that’s it!
The dragon award said to give out facts about yourself. I’ve already done that so much I’m sure most people want me to take some of those facts back. TMI Alice, is something I have heard, possibly, once or twice. So I’ll make up some stuff about me.
- In high school, I was a cheerleader, on account of all my pep.
- I used to have a talking dog named Cheeto, but he kept giving out my passwords to people so I had my dragon eat him.
- I am really a princess, and as soon as Julie Andrews takes off my glasses, trims my eyebrows, and gives me a new dress and etiquette lessons, I am going to totally take the throne. And write a diary about it.
- All that bad stuff I did? It was not me. It was my evil robot twin, Ecila.
- I see dead people. In the funeral parlor. The funeral directors keep telling me to quit stalking them.
- My dad is Obi One Kenobi, so I might actually be a Jedi princess. Don’t tell Twindaddy. He has orders to destroy me.
- I do a LOT of drugs. I mean, a LOT.
So there you go. I have acknowledged awards I forgot, and some I didn’t (because I just got them like minutes before writing this post) and I made up some stuff about myself. Yes, even the last thing. I’m not stoned, just weird.
Thanks to all my peeps who are still out there, hopefully. In keeping with my laziness, I give my award to all of you, mwah, mwah! And also to all the spambots.