Mary Alice Meets Her Prince

Mary Alice meets her, uh, true love, the giver of vacuums.

That Retro Blog

I first met my Bob at a party at Marlene’s house.  I was a junior in high school and had never had a boyfriend, never been kissed.  Marlene had had plenty of boyfriends, in fact, she had made her way through the class pretty well.  All the boys liked Marlene.  Few of the girls did.

Well, Bob Johnson’s family moved into town just a week before the party.  He was very cute, and most importantly, had not yet seen Marlene’s panties.  I was ready to pounce.  I mean, a girl must be a lady, but she also needs to take charge.  That’s what Seventeen magazine said anyway.

Marlene loved to play spin the bottle at parties.  Before, I had always excused myself for very long restroom breaks whenever this game came up.  Marlene still likes to joke about my bladder issues.  But this time I was determined to play.  I…

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