Catchy Creeper Songs

Have you ever been groovin’ to a song, then one day stopped and actually listened to the lyrics and realized you were happily singing along to a song about a creeper?  I just noticed that the other day when I was singing along to Billy Ocean’s “Get Out of My Dreams”  It’s quite catchy, if you just don’t think about what you’re singing.  But my Thing One immediately ruined by groove by saying “That’s pretty creepy, Mom.”  Where might she have gotten that idea?  Let’s look at the chorus.

Get Outta My Dreams

Get Into My Car

Get Outta My Dreams (get in the backseat baby!)

Get Into My Car (beep beep, ooh yeah!)

Here comes the man in the white coat . . .

Here comes the man in the white coat . . .

Hmm.  Okay, well, that is a little weird.  I mean, sure, we’ve all had crushes and daydreamed about a person before asking him or her out.  But . . . this guy wants her in his car.  And I mean, like, right now.  In the back seat.  Like, whoa, hey, buddy – let’s slow the car down just a wee bit, eh?

I’m not sure I’d be super happy to hear that a guy had been dreaming about me and now wanted me in the backseat of his car.  Not only that, he wants her to “touch his bumper” so they can “make a deal.”  Jeez, Billy, why not just ask her to get in the trunk?  Anyway, being the good parent I am, I started making up my own lyrics with stuff like “let’s tie you right up” and “stick you in my trunk (beep beep ooh yeah!)” etc.

Thing One found this hilarious, of course.  So yes, I am officially much more disturbed than Billy Ocean.  But it’s not just the song that’s messed up, but the video.  Remember this was the 80s, so people dancing around randomly with awful hair and clothes is a given, though part of the time Billy looks like he’s wearing a long white robe which is odd even for the 80s.  We’ve also got that innovative use of cartooning over film which sucks now and sucked then.  It doesn’t even have anything to do with the song.  We’ve got a duck running alongside the car with a boombox, and occasionally the light fixtures become mouths, and other psychedelic imagery that I don’t even want to think about.   Despite his obvious delusions, the girl hops in the car with him anyway.  I’m guessing she showed up on Unsolved Mysteries pretty soon after that.  Check it out.

Moving on.  The next song is an oldie but a goodie by Elvis, who is definitely not a creeper even if he did pick up his wife when she was like 12 or something.  The song is “Stuck on You.”  Stop snapping your fingers a moment and listen to the lyrics.

I want you just like that Elvis, dear.  Wait . . .

Please quit staring at me like that, Elvis .. .

You can shake an apple off an apple tree

Shake-a, shake- sugar,

But you’ll never shake me

Heh, heh, yeah, mmkay, how’s about I just get a handy little restraining order?  What do you say to that, Elvis?

Hide in the kitchen

Hide in the hall

Ain’t gonna do you no

good at all

Okay then.  Well, that’s just great, Elvis, if you don’t mind I’m just going to um . . . RUN!  But hey, there’s no runnin’ cause this guy is gonna “stick like glue” cause he’s you know “stuck on you.”  I’m picturing handcuffs here.  I mean, you’re great and all Elvis, but if the girl is hiding in the kitchen and the hall, maybe she’s just not that into you.  Just a guess, here.  We’ll all just wait till Elvis leaves the building.  While you wait, have a look at his video.  Just watch out for his hips – they’re armed and dangerous.

51 responses

  1. Wow…these guys don’t take no for an answer, eh? Do they get the Creeper Award?

    1. Yes, they do. I will have to hand out a lot of them.

  2. Mary, Mary is totally about a possessive ex boyfriend’s stalking – it super creeps me out – b/c of personal experiences… but most of the music I listen to is quite disturbing… I think it’s part of the ‘charm’. I have to say I avoid anything ‘billy ocean’…

    1. Yeah, I had to be a bit careful with making fun of it, because so many of the lines could be easily translated into kidnapping and maybe not everyone would find that all that funny . . . I do have an odd sense of humor. Haven’t been stalked yet, but it does not sound at all romantic and sparkly like in Twilight.

      1. Yeah, pretty much it’s not. Now if David Bowie was a stalking vampire….well…

  3. “Get outta my dreams, get into my car, in the back seat, baby” could just be a song about a taxi driver trying to pick up a passenger. Though, still, a very creepy taxi driver.

    1. No kidding. Um, I’ll wait for the next cab, thanks.

  4. Sting & the Police – Every Breath You Take. Totally creeper song. “Every breath you take, every move you make, I’ll be watching you.”

    It’s probably best not to wonder what goes through the minds of these songwriters, isn’t it?

    1. This one can be excused as it was actually written about spies and surveillance.

      1. But so much of the words seem to indicate it’s a love song! I refer to this section:

        Since you’ve gone I’ve been lost without a trace
        I dream at night, I can only see your face
        I look around but it’s you I can’t replace
        I feel so cold and I long for your embrace
        I keep calling baby, baby please…

        Oh can’t you see
        You belong to me
        How my poor heart aches
        With every step you take
        Lyrics from

        However, there’s another Sting & the Police song that is definitely in the creeper category and that’s “When we dance”.

      2. That doesn’t really make sense, though, Cutter – I mean it sounds as if he’s talking about a woman who broke vows and how he’s lost without a trace and dreams of her face . . . but I haven’t looked it up or anything.

    2. Oh man, that was the first song I thought of too!

      1. Great minds think alike. Plus I was somewhat musically addicted to Sting & The Police when I was 16 to, well, now, really!

        1. I love them too – actually I really love Sting. He’s hot. Stiiiing.

        1. I am! More tired than ever – but here 😉 haha

    3. And for some reason, loads of people pick this one for their WEDDINGS! Of all things!

      1. Apparently it’s “romantic”. *barf*

        There’s no accounting for taste…

        1. Sting himself was like “it’s not that kind of song!” Lol. I considered this song but thought it might have been too easy . . .

          1. Not to mention cheesey… Which for some odd reason, reminds me of Chesney Hawkes. I wonder what happened to him?

  5. My favourite creeper song is Every Breath You Take by the Police… I mean the song is about a who guy is a complete stalker… He just won’t accept ‘No!’ and he ain’t getting over it…

    Every breath you take
    Every move you make
    Every bond you break
    Every step you take
    I’ll be watching you…


      1. If you want Red Flags, try reading some of my 50 Shades recaps. There’s one in every chapter – at least.

        1. I’ll have to check them out! I skimmed part of that book and wow.

    1. I like when Weird Al parodies the song – Every Breath You Take (deep breathing) every move you make (more deep breathing) hahaha. I am kind of twisted.

  6. Haha this was hilarious! I had a similar moment with the Billy Ocean song where and the Sting song mentioned above where I was like “WAIT! What are we advocating here?!” So funny.

    1. Thanks, it’s funny how many times you can listen to a song before you go . . . hey wait. I was really perturbed when I found out Cyndi Lauper was singing about masturbation. Shee-bop, shee-bop! OH grosss.

        1. That’s what I said when I found out.

  7. That’s so funny about the Billy Ocean song, because a while back it came on in my car, and though normally I’d change the channel, I left it on and started singing. As soon as he heard the ‘get into my car’ part, my youngest said, “That’s creepy, Mom.” Guess our kids are onto something!

    1. That is funny! Kids can always see the emperor without his clothes . . . oh ew.

  8. I can’t believe you just made me watch a Billy Ocean video.

    1. You can get even and make us watch one. Do your worst!

  9. Fucking hilarious. Lmao

    1. Thank youuu, and thank Billy Ocean, and thank those freaked out cartoons . . . they haunt my dreams.

      1. Get outta my car and into my dreams…man, I need to get some.

        1. When even Billy starts looking good . . .

          1. Oh man…

  10. Don’t worry, you will never be as disturbed as Billy ocean, just put that white coat away…

    1. I like wearing long white coats. Then it’s like I’m a doctor, only not!

  11. Who ya gonna call? Creepbusters!

    Oops, you can’t do that. Ray Parker, Jr. inspired all 80’s creepers with lost hit…

    1. I gotta listen to this on my break . . . Ray, noooo.

  12. Sting and the Police, uhm…yeah. It’s not just one of their songs, or even two. It wouldn’t be too hard to put together a greatest hits album of songs put out by them that are rather creepy. “Don’t Stand So Close to Me” comes to mind as another one that is a bit disturbing.

    That said, I actually love a majority of Sting’s music, so I got over it easily.

    1. I think that one was based on his time as a teacher – I can imagine a lot of school girls having crushes on him.

  13. I still think it’s absolutely amazing that anyone will have “I’ll Be Watching You” by the Police played at their wedding. But yet they do. Just listen to the words – it’s the ultimate creeper song.

    1. It’d also be a good theme for that movie Twilight.

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