You Suck :D or Smileys Change Everything.

Good job!  :D

Good job! 😀

Communicating online is tough.  You just can’t get inflection across very easily.  Sometimes people think you’re being sarcastic when you’re not.  This is not usually the case with me, since most of the time yes I am being sarcastic.  But every once in a while, I might say something nice.  In this case, I need to let you know I mean it.  Since there is no sarcasm or serious font, the next best thing is our buddy, the smiley.  😀

Smileys are fabulous for getting intent across.  I can literally say pretty much anything and as long as I add a smiley at the end, it’s all okay.  For instance, I could say “You suck. :D.” and it’s just like saying, “You suck – just kiddin’!”  People love it when you say that.  A smiley is so much more efficient than having to write out “just kiddin'”, though.

Likewise, frownies also have their place.  Like if your friend says a house fell on her mother, and you don’t know how to console her, you can just make a frowny.  :(.  Sadface, my friend.  Or you can offer online hugs.  ((hugs)).  These are even safer than those side hugs that ultra conservative Christians do.

But really, nothing takes the place of a good smiley.  Especially if said person hates emoticons.   Here’s a quick example:

Darren: Hi! 😀

Sabrina: I hate smileys.

Darren: Sorry 😦

Sabrina:  Actually I hate all emoticons.  They are so irritating.  Why do people use those?  I mean, gawd . . .

Darren: 🙂

Sabrina: Now you’re just being a jerk.

Darren: You suck, Sabrina.  😀

See?  Darren gets his point across to Sabrina, but he softens the blow with a smiley.

But things have changed recently in WordPress land, and I don’t know if you’ve noticed.  Our smileys have gone rogue.  I used to get this cute little smiley and now I’ve got Buckwheat here.  :D.  I don’t get it.  Why does WordPress have to change stuff?  You suck, WordPress, you and your smileys.  😀

Still, whatever form your smiley comes in, it is a useful part of our new vocabulary.  Do you guys use smileys?  Do they annoy you?  Did this post annoy you?  If so, I’m totes sorry.  :D.  I do have to ask, though, how do you make one of those puking faces like you use when instant messaging?  This could help me out when I’m reviewing awful television shows like on TLC.  A terrified smiley would also come in handy.  Anyone with computer skillz that knows how to translate this on WordPress, please let me know.  I will reward you handsomely. :D.  No really, I will.  😀

Alice :D.

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65 responses

  1. I use smileys sometimes when I am texting someone ….. but there was a time when a friend of mine texted her boyfriend that she loved him (for the first time) and she received a smiley in return. Here it is http://www.valleygirlgonecountry.com/2013/06/01/he-sent-you-what/

    1. Oh no he did-n’t! I have to check this out. That’s worse than replying with “k” which is my husband’s favorite response.

      1. Ohhhh I hate that too…I will spend a good few minutes going into detail about something via text and all I get is a letter, THIS coming from a man that can talk your hear off and all he can respond is K. urgh.

  2. I’m sorry this post sucks so much. 😦 I hope you will do better the next time! 🙂 (((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))

    1. Hahaha! Thank you, my slightly rabid squirrel friend! :D.

      1. I wish there was a rabid squirrel emoticon… I would use it every time I commented!

        1. How about these until WP invents a rabid squirrel one:

          >:D
          o_O

          And this one needs to be my signature smiley from now on (assuming I can remember how it’s done): 😎

          Cool simply never goes out of style. 😀

        2. We should make a campaign to WordPress for a rabid squirrel emoticon.

          1. Where is WordPress’s headquarters? I’ll camp out on their lawn and throw nuts at the building until I get what I want!

          2. I’m right there with you! Maybe it would help if we kidnapped the editor’s cat.

  3. Smileys suck. 😉

    Here’s a link to help you in your emoticon endeavors: http://en.support.wordpress.com/smilies/

    1. P.S. This one: ❗ might work well with those pesky TLC reviews.

    2. Yay, Judah to the rescue! No puking smiley, but this one might work for my purposes. I often make this expression during reviews. o_O

      1. I often make that expression anytime my tv finds its way to TLC! lol

  4. I use it sometimes, but I would like to have my own. red. with horns and with a satanic grin instead of a smile

    1. The demonic smiley: for the Satanist that’s always on the go.

  5. I use them – along with all the other rogue punctuation that I make up uses for ~ (see, right to your <-) … I like using emoticons too when they annoy people… no one's stopping me from using expressive stuff that I want use… they suck :), no wait, they suck 😦

    1. Yes! I think that’s why I like them so much. Someone said they hated them. It’s the rebel librarian in me. >:)

        1. At least it’s not like back in the dark ages when we wrote letters (zomg) and some girls would put little hearts instead of dots over the i in a word. In purple scented marker.

          1. hee hee – I am actually a HUGE fan of letters (not scented purple markers of hearts) – unfortunately, my handwriting is the worst thing going, so typing saved everyone from having to decipher my scrawl.

            My brother had really pretty handwriting – it drove me bonkers.

          2. My handwriting was awful too. I remember having to practice that in school – yuck. I took so many notes in high school I couldn’t write a letter now if I tried, but I enjoyed them when people still wrote them. Sad thing is, a lot of history is in letters. People don’t tend to save their emails.

          3. Exactly – but people are reading/writing more b/c of email and texting (not that I text or even like texting, but that’s at least something, possibly, positive to come out of it…besides Mr. Wiener’s wiener).

          4. We will never forget about Mr. Wiener’s wiener now. Thank you internetz!

          5. he’s got the skilz – he’ll go far.

          6. You can if you have gmail. But of course then, the govmint might read it all.

          7. There’s probably a font for that. Except for the scent part.

  6. Haha cool.
    I love Sabrina’s story. 😛
    I didn’t like these much or maybe it’s because I can’t take this change so easily. As in, they’re HUGE._.
    The smileys we had last time were sickening tho. ” 😀 ” for sarcasm, 😀 to mock, 😀 to laugh like really laugh, and 🙂 when you didn’t mean to. Gawd.

    1. Don’t forget LOL, LMAO, or LOL no for reals I am laughing out loud. Because it’s used so immediately, like “k”, you have to point out when you mean it now.

  7. I never liked emoticons and vowed to never use them. Until I started using social media, that is. I have a sarcastic sense of humor at times, and as you point out, it might not always come across as kidding. Therefore, bring on the smileys and the winkies, just in case someone doesn’t realize I’m joking. But I’m with you, I’d LOVE a puking emoticon. That would come in very handy.

    1. It really would. You should pepper your next book in those suckers. It would for certain be a best seller then. I wish I were kidding, but in this market . . .

      1. Oh, jeez, you’re right. It’s only a matter of time before those start making their way into fiction novels. Eww.

        1. I heard they’ve already started putting in text speak.

  8. WordPress AND Facebook – both changed shit this weekend. They BOTH suck.

    1. What stupid thing did facebook change this time? Oops did we disable the privacy settings a-gain?

      1. Supposedly they “enhanced the look and feel” which translates into “it’s uglier than sin. again.”

  9. If it weren’t for emoticons, I’d long ago have been outed as the sociopath I really am. 😉

    1. I knew you always seemed too nice! That’s your secret, isn’t it? I bet you’re the one who disposed of the body in dj’s story! 🙂

      1. With some fava beans, and a nice chianti!

  10. I do actually suck.

    Your post reminded me of this snippet from Boondocks:

  11. I love me some silly smiley action. 😛

    1. Yeah, sure, silly . . . after you MURDER somebody! 😀

      1. Here’s something funneh…
        So, get a nice little email from my mom after she read my murder story – “well written, good job, yadda yadda, but… are you okay. you right such dark stuff, I’m worried about your happiness.”
        Or something like that…
        Apparently the Jester’s soul is dark and tormented. Who knew?! 😛

  12. Cheese and crackers…I leave WordPress for a month and this sh*t happens. 😡

    1. They also changed our privacy settings! Wait, that was on Facebook. Again. We have no privacy here. 😦

  13. I was hoping for a creeper one, but oh well.

    1. Would my gravatar work as a creeper one?

  14. Hi Miss Alice! I haven’t seen you in so long. Did you get my email? 😛 Are you ignoring me? 😥 Well, I’ve missed you. I truly have. I’ve gone crazy without you!!! O_o I hope these work… I’ve never tried them before. ^^’ Hope you are good! ❤ ❤ http://en.blog.wordpress.com/2014/03/21/new-emoticons/

    1. Trying to translate . . . brain exploded.

      1. Uh oh!!! Oh no! Are you ok, Alice?

        1. Yes. 😦 No. 🙂 Wait . . .

          1. My head just exploded, Alice.

  15. Like Carrie or Guapo, I need smileys. I try to avoid them as much as I can, but it’s just not possible to express intonation in the first-person speech. (This is why people prefer watching movies to reading screenplays.) And frankly, since I only have a serious and non-serious mode, I only really need the plain vanilla one, and I don’t really care how it looks exactly.

  16. I love the emoticons and thank you Judah First for the link. Now I can actually use them! o_O

  17. Good Morning,
    I nominated you for the Liebster Award, you can view it here ~ http://www.valleygirlgonecountry.com/2014/03/24/winner/

  18. 🐻 I was wondering how everyone was making new smileys, now I know! :mrgreen:

    (maybe, unless I completely screwed that up! Which would make me cry 😥 )

  19. I saw the post on the change. Apparently there’s loads of secret ones like a burrito and stuff. Which makes not much sense to me, unless you’re, say, 12. And possibly not even then.

    Although I remember one particular Famous Blogger™ who used to deplore them and berate anyone who tried to use them on his blog.

    I think you can turn off the smileys, which reverts them back to the old style, if I’ve read the WP’s powers-that-be’s post on the subject.

    1. Haha, yes, that is partly why I love the emoticons so very, very much, faith.

  20. Hi, Alice. I think the new set in which many faces are now more look alike and Mr. Green is nothing more than just being green and the smiling smiley is more like a grinning smiley and the font is wider.. is just great!
    Now can you please give me the name behind the new smileys?
    I’ll make it quick and refrain from using any torturing device. I promise!

  21. I :MAD: HATE THE NEW 🙂 ‘S!!!

      1. Better than a 🙂 anyday!

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