So I’ve been thinking about what to write and I’ve had no gripping, world-changing ideas lately. Because nothing compares to that whole condiment Sex Ed discussion. You can’t just hide your spices away and pretend nothing is happening people!
I could use the excuse of not being able to type on account of my fractured arm and my messed up toe (if I wrote with my toes that is). That was why I loaned my blog to Thing Two for a little bit (ten-year-olds: you give them an inch and they want your whole blog). Thing One had part of a post ready to go but then declared she was too lazy to finish it. At least she’s honest.
I can write now, even though my arm is still messed up, just as long as I don’t turn my arm like this. OW. The doc said I have to keep moving it or it will get stiff so you know, keep messin’ with that elbow. Pain is good! I have exercises for my arm that make me look like I’m doing the Robot.
So I was thinking I should get back to the old writing gig. But wait, maybe not, cause I just got a negative comment the other day from a concerned reader who Googled his name. The comment was on an old post entitled “Libraries are for Porn?” (because I am always classy) that featured a list of silly reasons people offered for banning books. Here’s a bit I lifted from that post including the list.
- “Encourages children to break dishes so they won’t have to dry them.” ( A Light in the Attic, by Shel Silverstien)
- “It caused a wave of rapes.” ( Arabian Nights, or Thousand and One Nights, anonymous)
- “If there is a possibility that something might be controversial, then why not eliminate it?” ( Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee, by Dee Brown)
- “Tarzan was ‘living in sin’ with Jane.” ( Tarzan, by Edgar Rice Burroughs)
- “It is a real ‘downer.’” ( Diary of Anne Frank, by Anne Frank)
- “The basket carried by Little Red Riding Hood contained a bottle of wine, which condones the use of alcohol.” ( Little Red Riding Hood, by Jacob Grimm and Wilhelm K. Grimm)
- “One bunny is white and the other is black and this ‘brainwashes’ readers into accepting miscegenation.” ( The Rabbit’s Wedding, by Garth Williams)
- “A female dog is called a bitch.” ( My Friend Flicka, by Mary O’Hara)
- “An unofficial version of the story of Noah’s Ark will confuse children.” ( Many Waters, by Madeleine C. L’Engle)
If you think no one would really suggest banning a book for such a stupid reason, you clearly have too much faith in the human race.
Anyway, here’s the comment:
Anyhoo, back to the blog. I’m wondering what to write about next (and how to make more people angry). I’ve had other themes I’ve started and never finished like Game of Thrones reviews (interest in violent nakey parody seems to have waned), the “Behind the Fairy Tale” series (I’m to Pocahontas – ZOMG how can I not do that? There’s just so much there, so many, many awful jokes), and of course my tortures of virtual people like Boppo Sadface that are my most popular posts, taking over from the Dragon Tales psychopaths who were seeking out my blog. Now people just want to know how to kill pixels. Refreshing.
But what do you want, good readers? Let me know in the comments below!