Tag Archives: evil squirrel’s nest

Thing Two’s Contest Entry

I told my nine-year-old daughter, Thing Two, about Evil Squirrel’s contest.  She insisted on submitting her own entry.  Here it is unedited.  Make of it – what you will.

One day, A Uni-kitty named Possum (in uni-kitty it means Dumb but) Was playing a squirrel on lego Batman 2 on his Wii until he felt something gross on his head for, it was a old dirty possum. This was unussal, Even for a uni-kitty. Possum freaked out and ran across da room until he ran into his Origami Yoda collection.

Note: Unikitty has telephathic powers

Note: Unikitty has telephathic powers

“WHO DA HECK R U DUDEZ?” Possum questioned. “Boy are you a super dumb but, for I am Gandolf the pink” Said the possum. “ GANDOLFZ WUT A WEIRD NAME!!!!” “ Like dude I am like the magi of

Gotham city yo!” Gandolf stated. Possem stared at the TV like Bella,

he felt pretty dumb. He knew EVERYTHING about Batman ,but he couldn’t say that he has heard of it before. “ Ugh, like I am a wizard so I

can do magic and do that thou shall not pass stuff.” The wizard replied.

“OH YEA MAN DIS IS SO STOOKY YO!” “I LIKE WISH DAT I WASZ BATMANZ!!” So, Possum got his wish.

Note: Pretty sure this still beats dj’s entry.

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My winning contest entry

In case you didn’t know, ES (Evil Squirrel) is running a contest in which you get like 20 dollars worth of free nuts.  Or, wait, no, it’s free stuff from his store.  Whatever it is, I am going to win it because so far I only have djmatticus competing with me, and let’s face it, his cute little story does NOT have what it takes to win squirrel merchandise.  Not when I have this fabulous drawing here. (Click to enlarge the fabulousness.)

Suck it, dj.

Suck it, dj.

As you can clearly see, I’ve got a squirrel, a unicorn (no one said it had to be a real unicorn so I’ve got Sad Pony all dolled up) and a possum all in the picture.  All required elements.  Squirrel is in love with the possum because the possum is wearing glasses and reminds him of someone he knows.  Also, I threw in a tree filled with nuts.  I’m awesome that way.

So anyhow, now I’ll just wait for ES to award me my prize while dj goes off and cries like a little girl.

Update: Goldfish and Judah and even one of my Things have also entered as competition.  Dj is still gonna cry like a little girl.