Tag Archives: hope

How do you fight evil?

Note: This is not a post furthering an agenda.  Unless that agenda is “Try not to be evil.”

I’m sure most people know about the Orlando shooting by now.  I didn’t until just this morning because I tend to avoid news outside of what pops up uninvited on Facebook while I am talking to friends on chat.  I had just discovered the brilliant workaround of placing a napkin over the fb news box when I started chatting with my pal Merbear.  First we discussed our emotional states (meh) and how to scramble eggs properly (I cannot even accomplish this) and what we were currently eating (Me: waffles.  Her:  An English muffin with sausage and cheese – just in case you were wondering).  She had just written a post on the tragedy, and was more than a little bummed that our world seems to be going straight to Hades.

The Onion had the same sentiment.

The Onion had the same sentiment.

“It’s simple, evil exists.” she said.  “How do we fight evil?  How?”

I’ve had difficulty writing lately.  It’s hard to see outside of a sad pony, and often you turn inward.  My plan was to try to pull out a post for my daughters’, because Thing Two just had a birthday on the 10th (12 years old?) and Thing One will turn 16 (16 years old?????) on the 17th.  Then I realized that even with the depressing subject matter, I could do both.  Mer mentioned that she wouldn’t want to bring children into this world now.  I agreed, but then I thought of my own kids who are here now.  I felt badly for them, for all the violence and hatred that they have faced, and will face.  But then I remembered that they are the answer on how to fight evil.  You fight evil with good, and hope, and love.  I know, I don’t normally talk like I’m farting out skittles (as Merry would say), but it is the truth.

toot toot?

toot toot?

The other day we were driving and a man stood on the corner with a sign.  As usual I tried not to make eye contact.  I never know what to do in that situation.  It’s kind of dangerous to just hand out money to someone while you’re driving – you might get hit by someone.  Plus I wonder if it will do any good at all.  One dollar?  Five dollars?  I don’t know.  But when I looked behind me I saw that Thing One had her hands grasped in prayer.  I thought it was because I’d just called her, in a friendly type way, a little twit for something.  But no, she was praying for the man.  Because, as she said, he’d asked for prayers.

No fanfare.  No look at me I’m praying!  I’d have never noticed if I hadn’t looked back.  Sure, you might say, it’s just a prayer.  She didn’t go out and invite the homeless person into our car so we could get him a room at the Hilton with a free breakfast.  But she did do something that too many Americans aren’t doing enough of today.  She took a few minutes out to think about someone else’s misfortune.  Her sister is equally sincere in her empathy for others, often challenging those who bully others.  I try to be a good mom, but that’s not all me.  A lot of that is just who they are.  And it is those values that will give them hope to keep going, to keep offering kindness, and to make a difference in this world.

And they, thankfully, are not the only ones.  A line of people formed around a blood donation bank early the next morning.  This was symbolic not only of thinking of others, but of doing something about it.  They were giving blood for the blood lost.  It will be too late for the 50 victims of this tragedy, but not for the many injured people today, and those who may sadly be shot tomorrow.  As John Oliver says, “The terrorists are vastly outnumbered.”  I’ll show you a clip, because he says this all better than I do.

I saw much discussion in the comment sections of articles on Facebook.  As usual, many have turned to politics.  Either wanting to take guns or have more guns or complaining about the agenda to have guns or not have guns, or just blaming it all on Obama like they do the mayonnaise shortage at your local Subway.  Certainly the fact that it was a gay club, and the terrorist was Islamic played into the response in places.  But that – as I stated above – is not what I’m getting into right now, although I easily could (and have).  It’s about the basic question: How do we fight evil?  Hint: It’s not in a political argument on Facebook.

It’s in thinking of others.  It’s in doing for others.  It’s in following the greatest commandment no matter what your faith: Love one another.  Even if all you do is buy a coke for one person feeling down (you don’t have to buy a coke for the entire world), you did something.  You made a difference.  We all make a difference, all the time, with our words and actions.  For good or for bad, we make a difference.  Let’s try to make the right difference.  Here’s just a few more examples of what people have done for the victims in Orlando, Florida, from the Orange County sheriff’s office.

We thank the legions of supporters who are reaching out to the Orlando community!!
As the investigation remains active and open in the horrific Pulse nightclub mass shooting, here are some resources and links available to the public.
•Orlando officials are identifying the victims and notifying their families. The names of the victims will be added to this link: http://www.cityoforlando.net/blog/victim….
•The Department of Veterans Affairs is providing emergency mental health assistance to Veterans, employees, and the general public in wake of the mass shooting. An Orlando VA Medical Center Mobile Medical Unit is located at the Beardall Senior Center, 800 Delaney Ave, Orlando, 32801, or call 321-277-6672.
• Blood donations — OneBlood has reached capacity for blood donations, so no further donations are immediately needed. However, anyone interested in making an appointment to donate in the near future can go to oneblood.org/donate-now/ or call 1.888.9Donate.
•Funds for victims and families — Equality Florida has set up a GoFundMe page at Gofundme.com/PulseVictimsFund.

I wish my beautiful daughters good luck in the future.  It may look dim now, but they will add brightness.  Because they are my Things.    They are my antidote to despair.  They are my reason for hope.  I love them both, and wish them a happy birthday.

~Alice

Beware Fairies Bearing Gifts

Of all the Disney princesses, I think I can most identify with Sleeping Beauty.  I happen to be a champion sleeper as well – at least during the day.  Night is another thing altogether.  I’m also fairly certain that were I to touch a spindle and try to make wool, I’d definitely prick myself and possibly fall over dead (or pretend to) because I’m not much into spinning.  It sounds like way too much work.

Looks like a lot of fun, doesn't it?

Looks like a lot of fun, doesn’t it?

I think there’s a little more to this story than the spindle and narcolepsy, though.  I’ve come to see it as a reflection of depression in creative people.  Yeah, okay, bear with me and I’ll explain.  You remember when Aurora (that’s Sleeping Beauty’s name btw) is a baby and those fairies came to bestow gifts upon her?  There was the bossy one with the stick up her hiney, the flighty stupid one, and the chubby feisty one.  And then there was the one who wasn’t invited to the party.

You know, you’d think when the king and queen were making out invitations, they’d have considered that.  Like, hmm, I’ll invite Lord Frances and Maid Mildred and uh oh hmm what about the psycho fairy with all that evil power and the bad temper?  Nooo, I don’t want her around.  Maybe she won’t notice if we leave her off the guest list.  She’s always been so REASONABLE before.

Totally reasonable

Totally reasonable

People in fairy tales are stupid.  But nevermind that.  Back to the gift giving ceremony.  See these fairies come to give gifts to the princess, stuff like beauty and singing ability, so that if the princess thing doesn’t work out, she can still make a killing on American Idol.  I’m not sure if without these gifts the princess would be ugly and tone deaf, or if they just perform enhancements, like extreme princess makeovers.

Anyway, I believe most of us are given gifts at birth.  Maybe they’re not readily apparent gifts, but everyone has something they’re good at.  Even evil people are pretty good at being evil.  You have to give those dictators props on that one.

I know I was given gifts at birth.  And I can imagine it going something like this.

Oh, wow, this one's gonna need some work.

Oh, wow, this one’s gonna need some work.

First fairy comes up and swings her wand and says “I give Alice the gift of artsy fartsy!  She will be able to draw well and impress everyone but art judges!”  Then the second fairy steps up and whaps me with the wand and says “I give Alice the gift of writing which she can use to get two useless degrees and a blog!”  And then the third fairy steps up, all prepared to give me something like the gift of total hotness, and that’s when the evil fairy my parents didn’t invite shows up.  Way to go, Mom and Dad.

Evil fairy appears in a ball of fire (she likes to make an entrance) and cackles “I curse Alice with depression, so that no matter how good she is at art and writing, she will only be able to do it about half the time and she will mostly just want to sit around and whine!”  It goes without saying that I really, really hate this fairy, and I do wish she’d quit visiting so many people.

But lo, there was one fairy left, right, the one who was going to give me something useful like being a total hottie, and she says “Well, you’ll still have depression, but I’ll give you these drugs that will sort of work part of the time.  And I’ll give you a counselor.  And I’ll give you family and friends.  And I’ll even give you – a blog!  Ta-da!”

So, then, I don't get the hottie look?  Crap.

So, that’s why I don’t look like this.  Crap.

Yeah, thanks a freaking lot, good fairy.  I mean, yes, I guess it’s something.  The fairy offered hope, and without that, none of the other gifts matter one bit.  But still – I wonder why do people get this stuff?  I know there is a genetic component but – why?  Only pure evil would bestow such a gift on any child.  For you can get through anything, even the worst diseases, the greatest tragedies, with hope.  But depression seeks to rob you of that hope, for the evil fairy is more powerful than that good fairy.  Which is why you must rely on those gifts, however weak they may seem.

We all have gifts, be it art, or music, or writing, or even just meaning something to somebody else.  And we have to try to use those gifts, even when that evil fairy is staring down at us in dragon form, prepared to blow us away.  The most important gift of all comes from the third fairy – the chubby, snarky fairy who did her best to counteract the curse.  Use that fairy’s gifts – use your friends, drugs, counseling, whatever the heck works for you in order to stay awake.  Do not be like Sleeping Beauty.  Do not let the evil put you to sleep.  There is no prince in this story.

Overwhelmation: A Post on Physical Illness and Mental Health

Slightly more serious than my usual fare, but still an important issue I think – check it out on Canvas. (And yes, Sad Pony makes another appearance, too!)

ONE SHOW TO RULE THEM ALL – SESAME STREET

Can you think of any children’s show you actually like?  Well, I could try.  How about . . .
SESAME STREET
Before anyone gets up-in-arms, I will say that I am not going to trash Sesame Street.  I just couldn’t.  It’s an awesome little show.  Almost everyone forty and under grew up with this show.  The fact that it is still on the air after over thirty years, with many of the same actors, is testament to the quality.  But I wish to review it anyway, because the shows I snark on could stand to learn a lot from their example.
Bite. Me.
Are there sunny characters that make you want to puke?  Oh, sure.  But for every Elmo (more on him later) there is an Oscar.  Oscar the Grouch is a hairy green puppet that lives in a trash can.  And he LIKES it there, thank you.  In response to his relentlessly cheerful neighbors, Oscar says, essentially “Bite me.”  I admire that in a puppet.  There is also Bert, who contrasts Ernie in an odd couple sort of way (there has been endless speculation from people with too much time on their hands – like me – who wonder what their relationship is exactly.  I say they’re brothers, since they live in the same house.  And I’m sticking to that.)  Ernie is chipper and bouncy and loves stuff like lollipops.  Bert, on the other hand, likes to sit quietly and read (while Ernie tortures him with joy and gladness).  He prefers linoleum to lollipops.  I like Bert.  My husband has said that when Bert finally snaps, he’s sure to take out Ernie first.  But he hopes Elmo is next.
“H” is not for Homey, Elmo.
Elmo is a special case.  Elmo came after a lot of the first generation of Sesame Street viewers grew up.  He is an INVADER.  And not only that, he has his own little spot on the show, called “Elmo’s World”.  Elmo is another scarily cheerful puppet with a high-pitched voice who speaks in third person.  Elmo wants this, and Elmo wants that, etc.  You know a show has a loyal following when adults get violently angry about a new puppet usurping authority.  “We had Grover, darn it, and we were HAPPY.”   But little toddlers love Elmo.  Which means their parents, people of my generation, had to watch him.  And buy the toys.  One of them, “Tickle Me, Elmo” (less said about this the better) was one of those hard-to-find toys one Christmas.  Which meant parents were tackling each other to get a toy of a character they felt had ruined a part of their childhood.  Ironic, that.
WTF?  Where me freakin’ cookies???
But Elmo is still only one character.  Most of the characters are multi-faceted.  They aren’t just nice or mean or happy or sad.  They have personalities.  Grover is sweet and lovable (and also speaks in third person) but has a definite mean streak, like when he’s acting as an incompetent waiter.   And Big Bird has such vivid delusions they actually come to life.  Anyone else remember when Snuffleupagus was his imaginary giant friend?  Now everybody sees him.  I guess they figured if they were friends with a six-foot tall bird, an enormous  whatever-he-is wasn’t such a big leap.  Cookie Monster will always be one of my favorites because of his total lack of self-control.  Don’t listen to those guys trying to make you eat healthy, Cookie Monster!  “C is for Cookie” is good enough for me, too.  He has been paired with polar opposite Prairie Dawn, who is one of the few puppets that you can actively imagine has a stick up her behind. 
And that’s what makes this show so good.  You forget these things are puppets.   People develop genuine love for these characters.  They are purple, and blue, and green, and no one is better than the other (not even Elmo).  Without resulting to syrupy didacticism, this show does present good values to kids, partly because it all just comes naturally.  Seeing such different looking creatures – and their non-caricatured adult human friends – interact promotes diversity.  You don’t have to spell it all out, as in – “Look, here is Cookie Monster, an obsessive-compulsive blue puppet who is hanging out with a hairy, green, homeless hoarder named Oscar!”  Kids can see that for themselves.
The 70’s were a long, long,
 LONG time ago
Sesame Street also has something to offer adults.  There are parodies of everything from “Saturday Night Fever” to the more recent “Law and Order”.  Even Dr. Phil has been puppetized, to hilarious effect.  Also, there are the guest puppets like the “Yip-Yip” aliens.  These wacky looking characters beam down with their giant mouths yipping as they try to understand human culture, usually mistaking clocks and phones for humans and cows.  I can still watch clips of this show and laugh out loud.
Sesame Street is located on a city street, not a sanitized suburb.  This is not a gated community like so many children’s shows.  This is real life – only with puppets.  It’s true that too many of these inner-city neighborhoods are violent, and unsafe, but not all.  Some of them do have neighbors that will work together and form a community.  And even if they don’t, Sesame Street is something to aspire to – it is hope.  The songs, which also stick in your head, are actually meaningful.  It isn’t easy being green, but there are good things that come with the color, along with the bad.  You can come and play here, everything’s A-okay.  Can you tell me how to get to Sesame Street?
But my favorite message of all comes from crazy old Cookie Monster.  “What is friend?  Friend is somebody you give up last cookie for.”  If Cookie Monster can give up a cookie, maybe there is hope for the rest of the world as well.
Final Analysis
Hairy, red usurper – YES
Multiple Personalities and Disorders Presented – YES
Diversity Promoted Without Nausea – Yes
Is C for Cookie? – YES