I was so filled with happy when I got to Facebook; this morning and discovered it was National Grammar Day. A day two celebrate a dying art! I know I tried and use the proper grammaticals each day cause I majors in it when I were in that they’re college and it promotes the dental hygiene did you know some peeps dont understand grammers? And that them peeps, be all over that Internetz? Like OMG its true! One has to asks, “Is our children learning? Well, is they???”
So just four you’re information Im gonna give grammer rules so you not be looking like no fool. Here goes!
1. Don’t worry about (your / you’re), (their / they’re / there), or (its / it’s). There interchangeable! I know I see it all the time on the internetz.
2. If unsure, just throw in, a comma, or two, or even a semicolon; cause it makes you, look smart?
3. When in a hurry just forget about using punctuation at all cause it only slows you down and their are things to do and places to go and people to kill and we aint got time fo dat you know what I mean right
4. It is always “Sam and I” no matter where those words go in the sentence. Always. For instance, Barack Obama gave Ebola to Sam and I.
5. Bloggy is not a word and never will be ever ever ever ever. So stop.
6. Ignore that squiggly lines that appear under you’re words when you types. Their just for decoration!!!
7. Grammar Nazis first appeared in World War II and tortured Jews by inventing lots of random rules four how to write and say stuff but they were German so we dont have to use thems.
8. If you screw up a word enough times it will appear in the dictionary the way you screwed it up! So just keep on keepin’ on.
9. English is a mystical language that not even English teachers understand they just pretend they do so they look smart dont listen!!!
10. If you’re grammars still not gooder after reiding this, you can always get a career as a spammer. Example:
Hey just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The text in your post seem to be running offf tthe screen in Safari.
I’m nott sure iff this is a format issue or something to do with web browser compatibility but I thought I’d post tto let you know.
The style and design look gret though! Hope you get the problem fixed soon. Kudos
And one more speshul one for the road:
11. Alice often uses grammar incorrectly. She does this on purpose. It is called stylistic writing and means she is hipster not dumb. Someone tell her mom.
Any other grammar rules you’d like people to follow? Or maybe forget? Let me know in the comments below!