Tag Archives: Rollergiraffe

Sour Grapes and Whine

Exciting things have been happening in my blogger circle.  Le Clown did the impossible.  He got freshly pressed!  We were still reeling from someone getting pressed that was actually im-pressive (do you see what I did there?) when we heard that his lovely wife Sara had also been freshly pressed!  Talk about weird odds!  Not only that, she was pressed for a post on the clown’s serious site, Black Box Warnings, which is really cool because it calls attention to medication issues.  As someone who often has knee jerk reactions to those that are anti-meds because of personal experiences, I have seen a little of both sides and this site has made me rethink a few things.  Don’t you hate it when people freaking make you think?  Ugh.

Math is hard. I want to be a veterinarian because I really like children.

Well, it gets even weirder.  Two more of his followers, Rollergiraffe and Bumble Files were also pressed!  In fact, if you look right now, Le Clown, Sara, and Rollergiraffe (I hear her name is Jen) are all on the same page. I’ve never seen so many blogs I know and actually like on a Freshly Pressed page before.  And not one of them wrote about cooking or photography or cooking photography.  Amazing.

Pretty sure I have a recipe for Bunny Tea somewhere . . .

I am so very happy for all of these people, especially Le Clown and Sara because they have done so much for the blogging community and brought many of us together in their insane little circle.  It’s about time they got paid back for all their effort.  And I say this not because I actually consider them bloggy friends (we are still, like bloggy friends now that you’re famouser, right?) but because I mean it.  I’m not exactly a nicey nice person for the heck of it.

I am SO nice.

Which is sort of my problem.  For while I am genuinely happy for my friends, I admit that there is a part of me that is well, you knew this picture was coming up right? 

No, I will never get tired of this picture.

Remember the old cartoons with the devil and the angel on a person’s shoulders?  The angel says “Yay, you should be so happy for your friends!”  But the devil says “You’re so jealous you can’t see straight.  It’s not fairrrrr.  Hey, uh, want to make a deal?  I have this bald puppet friend that’s good with curses.  Just FYI.”

Psst, Alice, I can put a horse head in their comments box.

It’s a terrible battle, isn’t it?  The green-eyed monster really likes me.  He’s been hanging out since I was small.  It’s not a fun thing to admit that you can be a jealous little twerp.  But here I am, admitting it.  It’s one of my faults that I struggle to overcome.  Hey, that was totally an epiphany.  That’s like, something they might put on, I don’t know, some site that shows impressive blogs, you know?  Where are my food pictures? 

There’s food here. Supposedly.

I’m getting off track.  I do know I’m not the only jealous little twerp because up until this week Le Clown has been making awesome badges like this one. 

I have to admit. I love this one.

He thumbed his nose in the face of Big Brother WordPress.  Bah, WordPress!  Le suck, WordPress!  What’s this, I’m freshly pressed?  Whooo-hooo! (BTW this is exactly what I would do.)

So now we are short one Robin Hood, one who stands in the face of the Big Guy, who robs from the rich blogs to give to the poor blogs.  We need a new hero.  I think I’m just jealous and whiny enough to fill that role.  I’ve even got an official badge now that Le Clown has sold out been conducted rightly into the WordPress Hall of Fame.  It’s a lot of responsibility, but if that little twit Spiderman can do it, so can I.

Alice:
Totally better than Spiderman

You know, unless I get Freshly Pressed.  Then you guys are totally on your own.  But since I have the ultimate confidence in thyself, I doubt this will be for a while, so get used to your new self-proclaimed champion.  Besides being a petulant wanna-be, I also fight zombies.  I’m pretty well-rounded for a hero.  Or heroine.  No, that sounds like a drug.  Why do female versions of words sound so bad?  Like Master / Mistress?  What is up with that?  Anyway, make that hero.  I am your hero, so no need to hold out until the end of the night cause I’m strong and I’m fast and I’m fresh from the fight.  Get it?  Fresh.  Also larger than life.  And totally original too.

It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it.  You’re welcome.

Update: Madame Weebles was also pressed.  I hate love you guys.

Warning: This post features clown images

Okay, guys, it is now day 276 of Le Clown’s blogroll challenge.  I will not give up, though, because I am a SURVIVOR.  Also slightly deranged.  For bonus points we are to take a picture having to do with the contest.  I can’t find a camera or a cord to upload the picture because I am sadfaced.  So I am drawing a picture instead which should show off my fabulous artistic skills (I do have them, but not on Paint so much.  It might be the insanity showing too, I dunno). 

Happy Nightmares, Le Clown!

To recap for those of you who haven’t followed my journey on Le Clown’s site, here is what we eager contestants have done with ourselves so far. 

1. In the comments, we gave a reason for needing to be on the blog roll.  Others had to offer likes for our comment which were counted up as points.  Some people offered to cure Cancer and build huts in Africa.  I offered the services of myself and both the voices in my head.  I got like 5 likes for that one.  Or we did.

2. We made a post on our blogs linking people to the contest.  I’m sure this was not just an attempt to drive more traffic to the clown’s site because he 1) already has tons of viewers and 2) most of my small viewership are either competing in this contest with me or have slowly backed away.

3. He employed others in his nefarious scheme.  Madame Weebles had a contest with Mad Libs.  We got to enter ten mad libs having to do with The Clown (I’m speaking English here cause I’m a real American, ‘kay?)  So we did.  One of mine was one of the winning mad libs.  This was the height of awesome, because I mostly just win that lame participation ribbon that only goes to lame people (no offense Lame Adventures).  I can’t remember which one won.  Some were not repeatable, and others somewhat psychopathic.  We got to fill in the blanks but didn’t have to use real parts of speech or even confine the blanks to one word at a time.  It was like if E.L. James decided to write mad libs.  Oh, the possibilities.

4. Rollergiraffe posted a pic of Le Clown eating a sandwich while having some sort of convulsion.  We posted captions.  Again, we got to do this ten times each.  I don’t know how many entries they’ve had by now, but their work on this contest may explain their questionable mental states.  I also don’t remember my entries.  I think one had to do with narcoleptics eating.  Because I am always P.C.

5. Today Lame Adventures had us make ten captions for each of four pictures.  These pics were from the zoo and were supposed to be Le Clown if he became an animal.  Well more of one than he currently is.  Again, ten entries allowed per picture.  Did I mention we were awarded clown noses for this?  I was proud of myself because I managed to work in the “Big Butts” song and a reference to Survivor. 

And finally, up above was the bonus points entry.  I can never resist extra credit, even when I already have an A.  Which I don’t in this case because there are others still ahead of me.  Will I make it when the roll is called up yonder on that site?  Who knows.  Fortunately, we have not been provided with ways to actively sabotage one another.  It’s a good thing, because I already willingly threw Le Clown under a bus for a spot on Love and Lunchmeat’s Zombie Apocalypse Task Force.  Maybe I should have waited to mention that one.

He says this is the end of the contest, so it’s down to the wire.  Tomorrow I have to post another creeped out picture to qualify for BONUS POINTS.  And then we will be done.  He says so.  We will be done right?  Who will win?  Who will lose?  Who will cry until the clown is so guilty we all get on anyway? 

Stay tuned.