Tag Archives: signed sealed delivered

Signed, Sealed, Delivered

Here I am baby
Signed, sealed delivered
I’m yours
– Stevie Wonder.

Is blogging writing?  I find that an amusing question.  I’ve seen people debate this in various articles, blogs, and so on.  Many people don’t know what blogging is, and if they do know, they don’t care.  Isn’t that just, like, an online diary?  Isn’t it kind of, you know, narcissistic?

me
Wait, where did that come from?

Well, yes, but I’m really not sure what isn’t when it comes to writing.  And yes, of course blogging is writing.  I know there are some bloggers who would hesitate to call themselves writer, as if writer were this magical title only bestowed upon those lucky enough to get published.  Let’s think about that a moment, shall we?  Who do we know who has gotten published and has the brain of a sea monkey?  That’s right.  E.L. James has been published and made millions!  Does that make her a writer?

Yes, it does.  She’s a BAD writer, yes, but still, a writer.  Anyone who puts a pen to paper or fingers to keys is a writer.  But there are, as always, degrees.  I had a college professor hand me back my paper once and tell me, “You can write, Alice.  I can teach certain things like structure and grammar, but I can’t teach this.  You have it or you don’t.”  Would you believe I had a major crush on this teacher?  Yeah, big surprise.  But he had a point.  People can improve to an extent, but either you have natural talent, or you do not.

E.L. : You don't.

E.L. : You don’t.

So there are bloggers out there, just like there are some published writers, who suck.  I mean, really suck.  Reading E.L. James was like repeatedly hitting speed bumps with my car, only instead of speed bumps they were stupid things.  La la la STUPID  la la STUPID la la la STUPID STUPID STUPID la la etc.  It’s hard to concentrate that way.  I’ve seen some blogs -no none of yours – that are also pretty awful.  A good way to find some of these blogs is to check out some of the random people who follow you before anyone else knows who you are.  For instance, there was one guy from the Middle East whose blog consisted mostly of pictures of half naked, overweight American women.  He was one of my first followers.  But he was what I’d call a “bad blogger.”

He DID earn one of these, though.

He DID earn one of these, though.

But there are so many good bloggers!  And just like with publishing, there are many who haven’t been noticed yet.  They just need a little push, usually from someone who already has an audience, and then bang!  Like me, they become wildly famous!  Yeah, okay, I’m not a famous blogger, but that’s okay.  I have an audience of loyal readers and I’m happy with that.  There was a time, and this probably happens with a lot of bloggers, that I thought – hey, maybe someone will publish this mish-mash of stuff I vomited on the page!  But I’m mostly past that now (not that I would turn it down Mr. bored publisher who happened upon my blog!).  All I’ve ever really wanted was to make people laugh, and sometimes think a little, but mostly just laugh.  And I do that.

Ha, ha, ha.

Ha, ha, ha.

I’ve seen what writers go through to get published.  Just check out Carrie Rubin’s blog to see the fun she’s had on the road to publishing.  By the way, she has this book out, and another one is coming out soon.  But the thing is, it’s just not worth it to me, at least not at this point.  Maybe when the kids are older, maybe when I have more time, maybe when I start farting unicorns, I don’t know.  But right now, at this moment, what I have is okay.

So in a way, this is kind of my love letter to my readers, and just in time for Valentine’s Day.  I can pretend I don’t care if anyone reads my stuff.  Like, I am a writer, and I’m good at it, I know this, and I don’t have to have people validate it.  I don’t have to, but, well . . .

signed sealed delivered

Pathetic?  Some might say so.  So be it.  Because here I am, right here, writing for myself, but also for the ones who read me.  I’ve discovered that there are more than I realize, people who read and don’t comment, who just “like” or even who just breeze by.  None of us can know how much we affect other people day by day.  Some of the best comments I can get are “That made me laugh.” or “That brightened my day.”  or best of all “That made me snort my drink through my nose, thanks Alice!”

So now I thank you.

Signed, sealed, delivered,

Alice