Tag Archives: songs

Chipper Cheatin’ Songs III: Country Edition I

Once again I’ve got a post inspired by a loyal reader.  I love it when you guys give me ideas, since my brain is fairly porous as of late.   Fearless Leader left in the comments section of the last post a video of  “Your wife’s been cheatin’ on us again”, a song where a guy helpfully lets his best friend know that his wife is cheating on both of them.  Thanks for the heads up, buddy!

Wayne was just trying to help ya out, man.

Wayne was just trying to help ya out, man.

When you think of it, what genre is better for cheatin’ songs than Country?  There are just oodles of songs of redneck misery, generally involving a pickup truck, booze, prison, a dog, a woman (or man), and railroad tracks.  Sometimes they mix it around a bit.  A couple of my favorite songs from the 1990s come from Reba McEntire.  That’s pronounced Rrrrrrreeeeeba, in case you were wonderin’.  Anyway, it’s hard to beat Reba when you’re talking about scorned lovers.  She will get you.  She might take you to court, like in “Take it Back.”  To a jazzy rockin’ beat (warning, there’s saxophone involved!) Reba tells off her boyfriend, “You must think I’m blind and I don’t smell your new cologne.”  Yeah, I mean, she’s not blind, she can smell!  Wait . . . what?

Reba's hair alone is pretty threatening.

Reba’s hair alone is pretty threatening.

But Reba knows how to sing it where you have no doubt she’s gonna cut you if you screw with her.  She sings “I hate to steal your thunder, but your playin’ days are through.  At least they are for me cause babe I got no use for you!”  Yeah, sing it!  Everyone in court jump up and let down your hair, and some of your clothes, and jump up on the tables, and the judge’s desk, whoop!  I had no idea court was so much fun.  I totally should have become a lawyer and taken my ex-boyfriend to court.  Though I could have gone even farther, like Reba does in our next entry, and just blown him to smithereens, thus saving the middle man.  But first check out Reba at court.

 

Okay, so now we’re to the I blowed up my cheatin’ husband song.  This time Reba had a duet with Linda Davis, a lovely singer with slightly vacant eyes who plays her husband’s cheatin’ lover.  They sing about who the husband loves best.  The video is classic, I mean even before they get to the blowing up part.  When Reba and Linda (around 1:25) both hold that award, glance at each other, glance at the husband and he gets this “I just pooped myself” look on his face?  Priceless.  Also, (at 2:08), you gotta get a load of Reba’s – wtf is that on her head?  A hat?  A scarf?  Some sort of animal?  But the best is that little smile Reba gets just before the boat holding the lovers goes “kaboom!”  Lesson learned.  Don’t screw with Reeeeba, ‘kay?

I'm going to GET you girl - just as soon as I get this thing off my head.

I’m going to GET you girl – just as soon as I get this thing off my head.

But there are so many unanswered questions here.  Where did Reba get the bomb?  Do you have to know a guy for that?  It just came in a plain brown package – I see a lot of those.  I’d better be careful.  Did they catch her later?  Is she in the Hollywood wing of prison?  Why didn’t Reba and Linda get together and blow up the guy?  Is it because Linda looks so freaking cute in those short shorts on that boat?  That would do it for me.  No one has a right to look that good in short shorts.  You go, Reba. Here’s the video.  It’s a real hoot.

 

Now that’s just a drop in the ole country bucket of cheatin’ songs.  Any others you’d like me to give the Reeeba treatment to?  Let me know in the comments below!