What is NaNoWriNo? Well, it started with Jen of Jen and Tonic when she decided she thought NaNoWriMo was too much work, so instead of writing 50,000 words, she’d just write a blog post every day for a month. Like with Nano, it’d be more about quantity than quality, which means we can make our posts suck if we want. Now I’d been doing that anyway (writing posts once a day, not sucking, although possibly that too), and it was making my head spin, so I decided to not do that. But then Jen said she was doing it, and then Speaker 7 said she was doing it too, and then this other blogger said she was doing it (I forgot her name, sorry) and so then it was like I had to do it too. Because when they say would you jump off a cliff if your friends did, that pretty much describes me.
Of course, I think Jen and Speaker have a much better chance of getting people loving even their suckiest posts because they are awesome plus they have mob ties with Le Clown™. He invites them over to his blog for parties all the time. Does he invite Alice™? No. And all because she might have said her contest was better than his because she lets people cheat. And she made fun of him. And she started trademarking whatever he hadn’t trademarked, including his name: Le Clown™. Still, is that a reason not to invite someone to be a guest on your flaming clown blog? No it is not. Don’t you like how I answer my own questions? Of course you do.
So anyhoo, that’s 30 blog posts right there, but allowing suckiness is definitely making me feel better about this. You see I type pretty fast, but not nearly as fast as I think (eleventybillion words a second), so I can write most blog posts in around 10 minutes or so (except the 50 Shades ones as they require reading and puking breaks). However, I like adding pictures, and this can take hours hunting around on scary Google Images for just the right stupid picture that probably no one will notice I snatched. So I figured I could try recycling my pictures, which I have never done before.
Speaker mentioned she might just write the word “Post” which is brilliant. She is also fortunate in that she has two blog helpers, providing they let Hugo out of puppet prison and Goofy gets out of rehab. I need blog helpers, besides Thing One and Thing Two who perch beside me at the computer while I type (except NOT when I am writing the 50 shades posts. I want to protect their fragile brains from Dumb™.) Maybe I can dig around in their toy chests. Or I could get a voodoo doll that might or might not be a clown.
Oh, right, and there was this other thing going on next month. No, not the turkey thing, the Movember thing, with the mustaches and prostate awareness and stuff. I’m thinking many bloggers will write moving and enlightening posts on this topic. I will not be one of them. Probably I will put a mustache on a turkey.
So this is Alice™ signing off. Let’s see which one of us poops out first. Or just uses “poop” in a post. Why is everyone looking at me?
If you don’t know who Hugo is by now, you have been living under a rock. An extremely boring rock. Hugo happens to be the actor playing Christian Grey in Speaker7’s rendition of the 50 Shades of Grey series. You might be somewhat prejudiced just because Hugo happens to be a puppet with a strange resemblance to Mr. Clean and no lower body parts. If so, you are clearly not recognizing true talent. Boy will you feel bad when he later gets his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, you losers.
Hugo stars with the famous actress Goofy, the previously unnamed blue stuffed rabbit. There are rumors that there is more to their relationship than just stuffing random objects up various holes. Also that he uses Herbal Essences bodywash and thus smells like a girl. And that, at the moment, he’s actually in a mental ward. Are these rumors true? Who is the REAL Hugo?
Though she hasn’t technically agreed to an interview, I figure we’ll nag Speaker until she agrees to answer the questions for a future post on her site. If anyone has any other questions, feel free to add them in the comments section below. I’m sure she has nothing better to do than to talk to puppets. Especially since her brain is falling out her ears.
Anyway, this post will allow her more time to recuperate from the trauma of the final book of Shades, so I think it’s really in her best interest. It certainly isn’t just because since being featured on her site I have gotten more hits on my site than ever before. Much more than the usual, some of which might have been my own views in my ever obsessive need to check my posts for errors. Yes, I actually check them, and they still look like this.
Without further ado, here are the questions for Hugo.
- How were you selected for your famous role?
- How are you handling your newfound fame?
- Is it true that you and Goofy are having an off-screen romance?
- Is it also true that Goofy is now cheating on you with Tickle-Me-Elmo?
- What advice do you have for other genitalia impaired actors?
- If you could say anything to E.L. James, what would you say?
- Are you secretly gay? Kate told me to ask that one.
- Is it true that you spent time with those guys in the white coats?
- What are planning next in your career?
- How DO your pants hang?
So now we’ll just wait for a response. Let the nagging commence. And I’ll see if I can catch up to any other fictional characters in the meantime.