Well. Just when I’d finished that other bling thanky post, I got another award. Oh, bother, can’t you see I’m busy? Hahaha, yeah I didn’t believe that either. YAY. Okay, so this happened to be the same award I’d already gotten, but that’s okay with me because Sad Pony and Squirrel have been looking longingly at my awards, so I can now share. But first they have to fight over it. I think they’ve been itching to do that anyway. Or possibly I’ve just gone insane.
I took it while Squirrel was playing with his nuts.
So what I got was the Liebster award, again. See, Storkhunter gave it to me this time, right after lovelifelaundry gave it to me. Did you know they were sisters? This blogging world is totally related. It’s like, we’re all connected, you know, like far out, man, like did I just smoke something?
If you’ll recall, the Liebster Award is the German one that is not an award for Nazi blogs. I feel the need to point this out. It is totally Nazi free. Just like the majority of American blog awards are free from Westboro Baptist Church. Except for the “Evil Douchebag Blogger Award.” which I’m pretty sure belongs to them.
Not the Evil Douchebag Award.
Right, but anyhoo, I felt the need to crank out another blog post because Storkhunter pointed out that, yello, you are supposed to answer questions and then make new questions for other people. Whoops. Once again I didn’t read instructions. What a Dummkoph I am! (Dummkoph is German for stupid head.)
Here are storkhunter’s questions, which are different from her sister’s. I know. And here I thought they laughed alike and walked alike and sometimes even watched stupid shows like Patty Duke. So here they are:
- What is the square root of 473? Red
- Do you make sure that you wear correct day of the week underwear? Yes. It’s Columbus Day, right? SHIT.
- If today will be tomorrow’s yesterday and today’s tomorrow, when’s tomorrow? Jupiter
- What’s in your fridge right now? Not sure but it’s achieved intelligence and will not let me open the door.
- Shirts – hang up or fold? Leave in the laundry basket until they mold together into one mass and someone says “Are these clean?” and you don’t know so you wash them again.
- Does it piss you off when people spell your name wrong? Yes. No one can spell my last name. But at least my kids learned how to spell their last name that way because I have to spell it every single time I go anywhere and give my name. It’s not that freaking hard, people!
- What music are you listening to right now? I’m asking this because I’m fed up of the tunes on my ipod. Need some good recommendations. I’m listening to crickets right now. But earlier I was listening to James Brown, king of parole. I feel goood.
- Pet names – love ‘em or hate ‘em? (I mean baby, sweetie, honey not Buster, Rover, Fluffles). Rover would be a good pet name for Ana Steele. Since she is a pet. Otherwise, hate ’em.
- Blogging in bed. Do you? Yeah, it annoys my husband when we’re being intimate and I say, “Wait one sec, I gotta respond to this comment.” He’s so unreasonable.
- Planes, trains or automobiles? Segway. I like to be cool.
- How much do you hate me right now? I love you. We are all connected in the great circle of life, like a wheel within a wheel, oh oh – Squirrel just puked all over the floor.
Okay, my turn. I get to ask you unlucky people questions which you can proceed to ignore but don’t, cause this is a chainmail award and if you do ignore it then Republicans will win the next ten elections. Don’t be responsible for that.
1. How much more fabulous is Alice than other bloggers, like, say, those who are French Canadian?
2. What’s your favorite book? (If you say 50 Shades, you go to Hell.)
3. Sad Pony or Squirrel?
4. What’s your social security number?
5. How many houses does John McCain own?
6. How many fingers am I holding up?
7. Edward or Christian?
8. What’s your most hated children’s show?
9. How much longer can I stretch out this post?
10. If one train is coming at 50 miles per hour and another train is coming at 75 miles per hour, what kind of sandwich am I eating?
11. What should I make my eleventh question?
My award recepients. Lucky, lucky people.
Stork Hunter (because she’s valedictorian of my made up class and that ought to come with some perks, right? Plus, she gave me this award and now she gets it back! Regifting is awesome.)
faithhopechocolate (ditto for the salutatorian.)
The Bumble Files (She boosts Alice’s ego. Alice likes that.)
Love and Lunchmeat (She let me on her Zombie Apocalypse Task Force.)
Childhood Relived (Because she reminds me of 80s stuff best left forgotten)
Carrie Rubin (Because she reminded me that there are decent books out there.)
StetotheJ (He writes the BEST blurbs ever, with swoony forsooths and whatnot. Oh, and he has great reviews on his site.)
Bling for everybody! That I remembered at this very second!
aliceatwonderland 
Thank you for the regifting. I will answer your questions, at some point, in the future, when the 50mph train and the 75mph train meet somewhere in the middle, but I will just nominate everyone who wants it to take it for themselves. I have a feeling if I regift the regift then we’ll end up with a game that will keep Rover … er … Ana Steele occupied for days.
It could be the internet fruitcake.
I was beginning to feel like m brain was going to melt from writing papers for school, so this post popping up became something of a boon/another procrastination. However, just reading your post hasn’t made my brain stop hurting enough yet. (Stupid philosophy of knowledge questions wanting to know how I know that brown is really brown and not simply salty-sweet stickiness.) Anyway, since I need my brain to cycle down a bit before I blow a fuse and become absolutely useless, I figured I would go ahead and answer your questions. Besides, even though I am a Republican, even I don’t want them around that badly right now, especially none of the ones the party keeps putting forward.
1. How much more fabulous is Alice than other bloggers, like, say, those who are French Canadian?
Alice is so much cooler than other bloggers, especially those French Canadians. I mean, come on now! We’re talking about French Canadians here> they get to be rude, but are so damn pleasantly polite about it that there is just no way to retort when they tell you to oh so kindly toss off.
2. What’s your favorite book? (If you say 50 Shades, you go to Hell.)
The Lord of the Rings
3. Sad Pony or Squirrel?
This is one of those times where being a student of philosophy comes in so handy. You see, in the debate between…
Squirrel!!!
Oh, where was I? I forget now. But that’s okay, Sad Pony is there to make me feel better.
4. What’s your social security number?
It doesn’t matter. By the time I will be able to collect, there won’t be any left anyway.
5. How many houses does John McCain own?
Not as many as his heiress wife.
6. How many fingers am I holding up?
Although I can’t actually see you from here, given how most people in the world feel about me, I’m going to play the odds and go with one, very specific, finger.
7. Edward or Christian?
Do I have to actually choose one or the other? I can’t choose “None of the Above”? I guess between the two, I would pick Edward. At least with Edward (and by extension his family) there would exist the minute possibility of immortality. Besides, I grew up in Scottsdale. I’m, already used to emotionally stunted, self-centered, emo, pretty-boy high schoolers. They grow on trees out here.
Besides, I’m fine without getting butt-plugged thank you.
8. What’s your most hated children’s show?
I think I would have to go with Barney and Friends. Although, it wouldn’t be too hard to make an argument for a few others out there.
9. How much longer can I stretch out this post?
You were an English major. If you haven’t mastered the art of stretching out a simple two sentence answer into a page-long essay, what was the point?
10. If one train is coming at 50 miles per hour and another train is coming at 75 miles per hour, what kind of sandwich am I eating?
One with mustard. A sandwich just isn’t a sandwich without good deli mustard (unless it’s a Reuben).
11. What should I make my eleventh question?
That’s a tough one. I think I would go with, “What, given that French Canadians are the most polite rude people about, Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings is literary whether the scholars say so or not, Squirrel and Sad Pony have run away together, Barney isn’t going away anytime soon, and this post has stretched out far too long, should my eleventh question be?”
1. True
2. Blech
3. Sad Pony and Squirrel think you need help.
4. I’ll keep it safe for you, just in case.
5. But lots. Lots and lots. I bet one of them could spare one.
6. Good guess!
7. I’m pretty sure Edward would buttplug you too. I mean, he sparkles.
8. Barney is up there. Yo Gabba beats him on the freak factor, though.
9. Saying nothing in 500 words or more is my speciality
10. Wrong. It was a meatball sub.
11. The eleventh question should be why are you answering these stupid questions?
He has strep.
Hey thanks for the award. I think. Actually I already have this one, but since you asked, my social security number is…
Waiiiiting with pen at the ready – I mean, you know, I was just going to keep it safe for you.
🙂
Patty Duke and The Westboro Baptist Church n the same post? And the said it couldn’t be done. Kudos!
Why, thank you. I specialize in wandering posts. I wouldn’t be surprised to see Octomom pop up. Oh, hey, look at that.
Congrats! There are more comin your way 😉
3. Sad Pony or Squirrel?
How dare you make us pick!
I know, it’s tough. Squirrel’s so psychotically bouncy and Sad Pony is so . . . Sad Pony.
My dear you linked StetotheJ to my page by accident…I was very confused as it’s early here but I’m pretty sure that’s not what you meant to do….
Whoops. I mean, I was just testing you guys!
. . . working on it.
Fixed! Finally. WP is being tres goof-ey today.
hehe hope stetotheJ appreciates your effort!
No wonder he never commented. Go fig! Lol.
1. How much more fabulous is Alice than other bloggers, like, say, those who are French Canadian? So much more fabulous.
2. What’s your favorite book? (If you say 50 Shades, you go to Hell.) I am probably already going to hell so…. Oh, I can’t even fake it. The Road
3. Sad Pony or Squirrel? Sad Pony
4. What’s your social security number? I can’t give you that. Would you settle for a bank routing number?
5. How many houses does John McCain own? Seven… teen
6. How many fingers am I holding up? You’re holding up one finger, and I’m concerned because I’m pretty sure it’s the middle one.
7. Edward or Christian? Neither
8. What’s your most hated children’s show? That’s such a long list… but Yo Gabba Gabba is truly horrible.
9. How much longer can I stretch out this post? Well, if each of us answers all these questions…
10. If one train is coming at 50 miles per hour and another train is coming at 75 miles per hour, what kind of sandwich am I eating? I love trainwreck sandwiches!!
11. What should I make my eleventh question? You really want to know what everyone ate for breakfast.
1. I lurrvve you like Miss Four Eyes loves Sad Pony and Squirrel
2. I couldn’t fake it either. Get it? Oh, Christipooo! Yes!
3. Sad Pony is rubbing this in Squirrel’s nuts right now.
4. Cool. I just love numbers. I have no idea what they means.
5. Who knows? He doesn’t.
6. You’re a good guesser. It’s directed at 50 Shades, though.
7. Yes, I would suggest a nunnery before one of those two.
8. That cucumber . . . that . . . cucumber . . .
9. It could be the post that never ends. Yes it goes on and on my friend!
10. Trainwreck sandwich. That should have been one of the 50 Shades book titles.
11. What DID everyone eat for breakfast? I had cereal. Crap. I should have posted that in my status on Facebook what will everybody do without knowing?????
Ooh, golly! Thank you! I’ll answer the questions here and hopefully remember to go and do a post about this later.
1. How much more fabulous is Alice than other bloggers, like, say, those who are French Canadian?
Alice is sixteen million squillion times more Fabulous™ than any other blogger, regardless of that blogger’s Magnificence™.
2. What’s your favorite book? (If you say 50 Shades, you go to Hell.)
I read too many books to have a favourite! Right now I’m reading the Cadfael books, so they’ll be my current ones.
3. Sad Pony or Squirrel?
Sad Pony, always.
4. What’s your social security number?
I’m British. We don’t have those.
5. How many houses does John McCain own?
I’m guessing more than one, but as I probably wouldn’t be able to pick him out of a line-up, I have no idea (and I’m not really all that bothered).
6. How many fingers am I holding up?
As many as you want to.
7. Edward or Christian?
Both, with stakes through their hearts and their heads cut off and their dismembered remains thrown on a bonfire.
8. What’s your most hated children’s show?
Byker Grove.
9. How much longer can I stretch out this post?
Not too much longer, you’re coming to the end of the questions and therefore the end of the post.
10. If one train is coming at 50 miles per hour and another train is coming at 75 miles per hour, what kind of sandwich am I eating?
A marmalade one, because you got inspiration from Paddington Bear.
11. What should I make my eleventh question?
“In an ideal world, what punishment would be meeted out to E.L. James for her diabolical use of the English Language and complete lack of understand of the BDSM world in the trash that she’s trying to call Literature?”